Wednesday, August 31, 2011


My lovely August model - Bailey!

Amadeus with his Mum

August 2011 - I think the Sock Monkeys were encouraging Amadeus to go a little crazy on his mother's shoulders. Not surprising, these guys will do anything for a bit of comedy relief and if they can get someone else involved, the happier they are. Of course, it's not that hard to convince a little human to have a bit of fun - after all, Sock Monkeys and little people totally understand each other!
It's been a great month - lots of funky socks this time around and crazy bio's. My sock monkeys seem to get nuttier the further I get into this project (I've been told it's me that's nuttier but I don't believe the voices...).
ANYWAY, keep reading, that is I hope people are reading this blog...we never really know. However, for those of you who do, the Sock Monkeys and I appreciate it!


RIPPER: Born - August 29th. Ripper is quite the Sock Monkey. He absolutely LOVES to rip things apart - hence the name "Ripper".  One day I caught him in my linen cupboard, ripping apart my sheets and working his way to the pillowcases. I just about ripped him apart when I finally caught him (fast little bugger). So, to make him happy and keep him away from my sheets, I hooked him up with the hospital. Every week he gets to rip apart old sheets and make them into slings which get packaged up and sent to the Army.  Ripper's happy, I'm happy and my sheets are whole.
BICKERMAN: Born - August 30th. Bickerman will sit in front of the television watching hour after hour of "Pingu", his penguin hero. Happy Feet doesn't hold up against Pingu and Bickerman will give you a list of why Pingu is better. Go ahead - argue the point with him and I guarantee you'll lose. Seriously? A tap-dancing penguin compared to Pingu? Hands down, Pingu rules...
VIVEKA: Born - August 31st. A very long time ago, Viveka opened a "wet wipes" shop. That's all she sold. Some were in boxes, some in fancy round containers, some in small packages for a bag or suitcase. All had different scents as well. The most popular ones among the Sock Monkeys were the banana scented ones. They came packaged in a container shaped like a banana. The problems started when the monkey's started eating the banana wet wipes and got sick. Some sued, others just died. Was very tragic. Viveka no longer runs a business. Hey, if you ever need wet wipes though, you know who to call....

Monday, August 29, 2011


WILBUR: Born - August 25th. Wilbur likes to measure things. He usually has a measuring tape wrapped around his neck at all times - it took me 14 bananas to convince him to take it off for the picture... I'm not even sure why he measures things as he never writes down the measurement once he's done and continually measures the same things over and over again. If something appeals to him and he feels it warrants a measurement, he'll stop at nothing to measure it. Interesting obsession....
MYRTLE: Born - August 26th. Myrtle shares the same birthdate as my grandfather (who would be 103 today if he were still with us) and the same hat. Not just any hat, but grandfathers fishing/walking/birding hat that is so worn, you can't tell front to back. Why does Myrtle have the hat? She claimed it as her home. At night she climbs inside and curls up in a ball and goes to sleep. During the day, she hides it away so none of the other Sock Monkeys will damage it. I'm okay with this as I know it's being well taken care of - and I love my grandfathers hat.
KASEY: Born - August 27th. Kasey has palm trees all over his body - not to be mistaken for "marijuana" leaves... Although, I can see how that would happen, I don't see how anyone would think I would make a Sock Monkey out of socks with pot all over them. UNLESS, of course it was for a "Cheech & Chong" movie (which we all love) then of course I would make one!! Who wouldn't? It would be hilarious to watch Cheech and Chong try to smoke it! Okay....maybe not...that would cause problems in the Sock Monkey world and you don't want hundreds of Sock Monkeys coming after you because you smoked one of their family. Not a good scene....
PATCHES: Born - August 28th. Patches tried to hide all of Wilbur's measuring tapes once. Patches ended up in the hospital for weeks with broken bones and black eyes. Patches learned a valuable lesson. Don't mess with someones obsession...ever.

Thursday, August 25, 2011


ALEXA & ZONDERVAN: Born - August 23rd & 24th respectively. These two sock monkeys wake up early every morning, look out their window and paint the sky they see. Some days are better than others of course as the skyline is constantly changing. These two can paint as quickly as you can snap a picture and one such morning they woke up to see a U.F.O flying by. Yup, not kidding.  They got every last detail of that spaceship before it was clearly out of sight - right down to the little kid alien flipping them "the bird" as he flew by......nice. I've now gotten into the habit of looking out my bedroom window as soon as I wake. You just never know what you might see. So far, it's been ravens and magpies - not very exciting I know BUT, one day it could be a raven or magpie playing tree golf or something exciting like that. Try it some time - you may be pleasantly surprised....

Monday, August 22, 2011


FOSTER: Born - August 20th. Foster recently got a very bad haircut...from his mother. You know the ones. Your bangs NEVER get cut straight and consequently end up shorter and shorter as she cuts until, there's no more to cut (or you'd be bald) SO, she just leaves the front and starts in on the back. The back isn't too bad - at least there's enough hair to hide the bad layers, it's the "over the ears" attempt that leaves you crying... ANYWAY, Foster shaved himself and no longer has hair - as you can see, he's just bald and beautiful. Smart move Foster.
CHASE : Born - August 21st.  Chase got tired of being the one who has to chase everyone in the game of "tag". Seriously. Every time the Sock Monkeys play this game (and to date that is 233 Sock Monkeys), Chase is ALWAYS the first and last one to be "IT". He runs around willy-nilly like and can never seem to run away fast enough when he's finally tagged someone. It's kind of fun to watch though. There's a lot of monkeys running into walls and doors, tripping over each other, falling down the stairs...come to think of it, I generally have to do a lot of repairs on the Sock Monkeys after a game of Tag. Perhaps it's time to think of a different game? Maybe "Monkopoly"....what could possibly go wrong with that?
LANCE: Born -  August 22nd.  Lance has Ants in his pants. Ha, Ha! That's freakin' funny!! That's also it for Lance. Got to find that boy a new pair of pants!! Hee, hee.....

Thursday, August 18, 2011


URIAH: Born - August 17th. Uriah used to be a bed-wetter. I really felt sorry for her as she tried every method possible to get her bed-wetting under control. Once, she accidentally put the wrong size battery in the little zapper unit (that gives you a slight shock when it gets wet) and damn near electrocuted herself. We took that away. So, how did she stop in the end? Well, she quit drinking the banana daiquiris before bedtime and lo and behold - she stopped peeing the bed!! Who knew?!
SIGGI: Born - August 18th. Siggi is a huge Wonder Woman fan. He has a little lunchbox with Wonder Woman on it and takes it with him everywhere he goes. Okay, okay, we all know where this is heading....OF COURSE he gets hassled!! I mean really - Wonder Woman? How come they have never made a new movie of her? They've done just about every other cartoon super hero BUT no Wonder Woman. You know why? Cause she's NOT cool! The Bionic Woman could take her in a heart beat! Siggi - get rid of the lunchbox and your life will improve.
WINNIE: Born - August 19th. Winnie is short for Winnifred. Winnie did not want people to call her Fred so she shortened it to Winnie. Personally, I like Fred better BUT, don't tell Winnie that - she bites! Anyway, Winnie works hard at keeping people from knowing her full name. As a matter of fact, someone asked her once if Winnie was short for something and she bit him on his elbow. Not kidding. She was just hanging there and this guys running around screaming "Get it off!! Get it off!" and we're all laughing our butts off. Come to think of it, I wonder if anyone ever helped that guy out? Hmmmmm....

Tuesday, August 16, 2011


FLORENCE, MARNY & DELBERT: Born - August 14th, 15th & 16th respectively. I always wondered when I'd come to that point where the well has dried up and I can't think of anymore bio's for these sock monkeys. Well, NOT TODAY my friends!! These three sock monkeys are responsible for ruining your day with hail. When they feel like pissing everyone off and seeing how many gardens they can ruin, they do a little "hail dance" and get the skies rockin! And, depending on how big they want the hail to be they just dance a little crazier... So, for those of you who were witness to all that hail that came down yesterday, you are all a little wiser as to where it comes from. Seriously. I watched them dance. Next time I'll record it and throw it on YOUTUBE for you...

Sunday, August 14, 2011


ROMEO: Born - August 12th. Romeo does NOT live up to his name - just want to clarify that. This little monkey is SO afraid of females, he breaks into a cold sweat when one happens to walk by...on the other side of the street. He is not a romantic and love struck monkey and would sooner live in a cave somewhere then have to converse with girl sock monkeys. Fear not though, we here at Sock Monkey headquarters feel it's just a matter of time before the right monkey walks into his life and changes him forever. Hope I'm around to see it....
REGINALD: Born - August 13th. Reginald is into decorating cupcakes. Not just your average "throw some icing on top" cupcakes, BUT, "extreme decorated, over the edge" cupcakes. He has been a guest on 'Cake Boss' and 'The Cupcake Girls' with rave reviews. The only downfall is that he is rather messy when he bakes. Not kidding. The kitchen looks like a bomb went off when he's finished. You can't get upset though because his creations are works of art. Oh yeah, they're pretty yummy too!


NELSON: Born - August 9th. Nelson has a re-occurring nightmare in which he is being chased by Platypuses and Emus. Once they catch him, they tie him to a maypole and proceed to torture him by forcing him to watch them play hour after hour of Parcheesi. Nelson is just a little bit wired when he wakes up...doesn't get much sleep... Poor, tired Nelson.
NYLAN & NEWMAN: Born - August 10th & 11th respectively. Nylan and Newman are Nelson's brothers. They both collect stuffed animals. As a matter of fact, their collections are so vast, they need another room to hold all their stuffies. Can you guess which animals they collect? Well, Emu's and Platypuses of course! No wonder Nelson has nightmares!! Mind you, Nylan and Newman think he needs therapy and once in awhile will lock him in the room with all the stuffies while they sit outside and play Parcheesi.... Gotta love brothers don't ya?

Monday, August 8, 2011


CAVANAUGH: Born - August 6th. Cavanaugh used to be a "Sir" at one time until he lost his title. It's a sad story BUT, the gist of it is, he beaked off to the Sock Monkey Queen and she almost had him be-tailed (a very horrible form of cruelty in the Sock Monkey world). However, since he was distantly related to the King, she wasn't allowed to do this and had to settle with taking away his "Sir" title. Just as humiliating if you ask me....
VEGA: Born - August 7th. One of Vega's absolute favourite movies is the 1980 classic sci-fi "Galaxina". This was one of the earliest spoof movies as it was said to be a parody of Star Trek, Star Wars and Alien 2. The best part of the movie is when they're stuck in jail and try to convince Rock Eater to eat the bars so they can escape. Of course he replies with "I'm a rock eater, you want a bar eater, get a bar eater" which to Vega (and me) is so funny it still cracks me - I mean US, up!! Watch it sometime - you'll love it!
POTTER: Born August 8th. Potter is NOT named for Harry Potter. He is named Potter because that's what he does. He pots plants from here to Zimbabwe or is that plants pots? ANYWAY, he loves working with flowers of all kinds and digging in the soil. Sometimes he'll find worms and stir fry them with his bananas for lunch - yummy! Okay, that was a bit off subject HOWEVER, Potter loves to pot plants...or plant get what I'm saying.

Saturday, August 6, 2011


AXEL & WILKINSON: Born - August 4th & 5th.  Both Axel and Wilkinson have been through some very tough times recently. They lost their business, their homes and their families due to a disturbance in the "Banana Force" which as we all know, surrounds all Sock Monkeys at all times. Why it affected these two in particular, we'll never know. The "Banana Force" is not something you question. As a matter of fact, the "Banana Force" has been around longer than any Star Wars "Force" and has guided all Sock Monkeys through their history. Does it do any good? Most Sock Monkeys will tell you yes, but they are the ones who fear disrupting the "Banana Force" and causing problems. Some braver monkeys (like Axel and Wilkinson) will tell you otherwise. Now look where they are. Penniless, homeless and familyless. Don't question the "Banana Force"...ever...

Friday, August 5, 2011


ZEIGLER: Born - August 1st. Zeigler (pronounced zay-glur), was recently in Japan working on a new computer component for his tiny fleet of robot beetles. This Sock Monkey is a genius when it comes to robotics and has worked on some of the world's top robot projects. Right now though, his main focus is getting his beetle fleet up and running so he can mass produce and sell to the highest bidder. What's so special about the beetles? No one knows BUT, if Zeigler is creating them, you'd better believe they are worth the bidding war....
HAPPI: Born - August 2nd. Happi is pretty much happy all the time. With that many smiley faces all over her body, she doesn't have time for frowning! Everyone LOVES Happi. She walks in the room and lights up the place with her "happy" personality and beautiful smile. See - you're smiling just thinking about her!
HELEN: Born - August 3rd. Helen is named after Mt. Saint Helens in Washington. This pair of socks was given to me by a friend who happened to vacation there, saw these cool socks, bought them and handed them over to me. If you look closely at her, you can see trees, elk and a mountain range on her body. Not to mention the words "MT. SAINT HELENS" written all over them. Great pair of socks to work with and awesome to have some with a name of where they were purchased.