Tuesday, October 25, 2011


ROSA GOLDING: Born - October 23rd. Rosa Golding can't seem to dig her way out of her depression. She has tried many times to rise above the waves but, seems to get pulled under more often than she'd like. Why is Rosa Golding depressed? She is depressed because she lives her life in the shadow of others, never really making a name for herself (although "Rosa Golding" is a very cool name).  Okay. This is depressing just writing a depressing bio. Roas Golding is NOT depressed and lives a very happy and authentic life. Yeesh!
LONZO: Born - October 24th. Lonzo works as a parts man in a local dealership. He's kind of moody and whines a lot. No one likes to play with him. They don't let him near the photo copier and they definitely don't leave scissors near his desk. On weekends though, he is a pole dancer at the Monkey Tail Bar and makes a ton of money.  Everyone loves "Lonzo the Lover" when he's out working the pole....
GISELLE: Born - October 25th. Giselle just had hip surgery for the 7th time. It started when she rode her bike off a small cliff at age 4. Now, at 22, she just looks the wrong way at a set of stairs and her hip gives out. Mind you, if I had birthed 31 monkeys, my hips would probably have given out as well.  At this point, we are looking for a hip donor. If you know of anyone who doesn't need a hip anymore, let me know and we'll be over with the surgeon.

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