ETHAN & HOLLIE

ETHAN & HOLLIE: Born - June 2012. Look at these two lovebirds. Aren't they just so cute? Don't you just want to hug them both and tell them how darn sweet they are? They're just so blissfully unaware and only have eyes for each other. In their world, neither can do no wrong, there are no expectations and their love for each other is unconditional. Sigh.... Doesn't it make you want to puke? Someones gotta burst their happy bubble and give them the facts of love straight up. Actually, don't bother. Give them a few months - at tops a year - and they'll be on each others nerves, expectations will be high and the unconditional love will be nothing but unattainable demands. Isn't true love great? 

Author's note: I am not bitter.

HEDGEHOGS?

In my never ending pursuit of ways to use bits of leftover socks, I had an inspiring moment when I saw my mother's hedgehog door stop and a light bulb went off somewhere in my brain - and I mean somewhere deep within the far reaches of a slightly off-balanced brain (just keep reading Bev...).

After a few attempts with different materials and larger eyes, I actually looked at a hedgehog picture and made some changes to the "proto-types". A slight tweak to my pattern, a smaller eye, no pink in the ears, shorter spikes and TA-DAA!!!! My newest "Sock Creation" was born!

Now what? Well, as usual with me and the way my mind works, I shall mass produce and take over the Toy Sock world one Monkey, Owl and now Hedgehog at a time. Yes folks, I am that diabolical and committed to pull this off.

ANYWAY, continue checking out my blog as you never know what may show up next in my Sock Creature World.

Author's note: If you are wondering about the Owl reference, check out my January 2011 blog and look for "Not Sock Monkeys - Sock Owls". If you're wondering about the "Bev" reference, just read some of the comments posted on my blogs....Love you Bev!! 

RUTHIE, BINK & KATT

RUTHIE: Born - June 2012. Ruthie is obsessed with anything that has to do with Beatrix Potter and all her characters she's written stories about. Her favourite being Peter Cottontail, Ruthie loves how he continually snitches vegetables from Mr. McGregor's garden and manages to dodge a bullet every time. Interesting. My neighbor called and said she saw a strange small creature trying to snag her prized pumpkin the other day. I think Ruthie and I better have a chat...

BINK: Born - June 2012. "Ink Bink, You Stink"! Poor Bink. He's heard that comment every day of his life from the other Sock Monkeys. Problem is, they're right. Bink has a "gas" problem and really does stink. Seriously, some days it's pretty bad and we have to quarantine him to the closet. I know - doesn't sound nice BUT, for the sake of breathing, it's the only semi-humane thing we can do.

KATT: Born - June 2012. Katt is probably the only Sock Monkey I know who wears socks. I found her in my sock drawer trying on all my socks and leaving a scattered mess of mis-matched socks everywhere. All I can say is it's a good thing it's socks she likes to wear and not underwear. That would not be so good...Katt in my underwear drawer... 

GENEVIEVE, STARLING & LOLLI

GENEVIEVE: Born - May 2012. Genevieve lives in a shoe box that used to house my CAT boots. Why she insists on hanging out in these cramped quarters, I'll never understand. All the sock monkeys have the run of my place and can pretty much "hang" wherever they want. Not Genevieve. She curls her long body up at night, lays down in the shoe box and insists on the lid being closed.  I guess it's not that different than me hanging out in the giant cardboard box on my back deck - which is supposed to be for my grandson but he doesn't seem to interested in it. Come on! It's a huge box! Who wouldn't want to hang out in there?? Okay, skip my top remark about "never understanding"...boxes are cool.

STARLING & LOLLI: Born - May 2012. These two Sock Monkeys have just started a new diet called "Eat Clean". Now, here's my first concern. Sock Monkeys only eat bananas, alcohol and sour chews. That's already a rather "clean" diet if you ask me. Secondly, I think they've taken the "Eat Clean" expression quite literally. They bleach the bananas and have taken to polishing the sour chews and skipping the banana daiquiris all together. What has the Sock Monkey world come to?? What if they all decide to give this a try? Soon they'll be nothing but a pile of sober Sock Monkeys running around here and all hell will break loose. Not a "sobering" thought.... Time to put my foot down and spike their water...

Author's Note: Seriously folks, these bio's are just for fun. I don't encourage my Sock Monkeys to drink nor would I ever consider spiking their water. It's all in good fun, please remember that when you come to charge me with Sock Monkey harassment and find me passed out in my cardboard box.....



BERNADETTE, BEATRICE & PRISCILLA

BERNADETTE: Born - May 2012. Bernadette was born near a Pig farm in Ohio. She loves pigs. Her entire wardrobe consists of well, nothing, except what her pattern is...which is pigs. She wears anything that has pink on it and collects all things "piggish". Pigs rock in Bernadette's world and you know what? I think she's right! Pigs are intelligent, clean (believe it or not), entertaining, quite loving and make excellent house pets. Having said that, I'd better make sure Bernadette doesn't read this or I'll have a pig epidemic on my hands...

BEATRICE: Born - May 2012. Beatrice is Bernadette's little sister. She was also born near a Pig farm but doesn't seem to have quite the infatuation with pigs that Bernadette does. As a matter of fact, she'd sooner bite into a nice bar-b-qued thick pork chop than pet a cute little piglet. Interesting. Perhaps there was a pig "incident" in her childhood she's not telling us about. Hmmmm... I feel a counselling session coming on. Maybe over a nice dinner of rump roast....pork preferably.....

PRISCILLA: Born - May 2012. One day, a long time ago, when the earth was much greener and the air was pure, Priscilla fell off her unicycle and hit her head. She has never been the same since and speaks in some weird dialect she insists is the ancestral language of all Sock Monkeys. Here's one of her sentences: "Owwen dee headen de bikenschnouser" which translated means "I fell off my bike and hit my head". If you ask me, I think she owwen deed her brain.......

ARTICUS & KELSO

ARTICUS & KELSO: Born - May, 2012.  Had to get these two critters out of my head and into sock monkey form. I enjoy creating the Sock Monsters. However, they usually happen when my life becomes so swamped with different stresses and my mind feels like it's going to explode and the next thing I know, things like sock monsters/goblins/trolls come into existence.

These two sock monsters are both fantastic at sniffing out dust bunnies. I sweep. I dust. I clean. YET, I can never get all the stinkin' dust bunnies that seem to congregate under my couch or next to the washing machine. Being the sneaky dust bunnies they are, I just set Articus and Kelso loose and they will hunt those suckers down for me and round them up next to the garbage can. I go in for the kill - OOPS! I mean for the gentle sweeping up, and into the garbage they go. I close the lid quickly so as not to hear the crying and screaming as they fall to the bottom of the can, forever trapped in a plastic bag that will be tied and handed off to the garbage man by Tuesday. Feeling somewhat guilty BUT relieved, I put the broom and dust pan away and take Articus and Kelso out for ice cream. Another successful dust bunny hunt over, we rest and plan our next adventure..... 



MORE MONKEY MADNESS....

DEACON, RAVI, OUTLAW & MIFFIE. All born in April of 2012 and all deliberately giving me the cold shoulder. Why you ask? Well, it all started three days ago when I was outside raking a pile of leaves and had asked these four to give me a hand loading the pile up and moving it down the bank. Unbeknonwst to me, they decided to jump from the balcony into the pile, spreading it around like mad monkeys and making a bigger mess than what I initially started with. Being the kind and wonderful person that I am, I only beat them a little and sent them to bed with no supper. Why they feel they gotta ignore me is beyond me. I'M the one who had to do the job TWICE! They're lucky I didn't rake them up in the pile, bag it and leave it out for the dump truck....

CHARDONNAY & MERLOT: Born in April and donated to the local Playschool for their annual auction. I have no idea how well they did but I'm sure whomever bid on them and won is enjoying this pair of Sock Monkeys with a nice glass of red wine. Yikes, that almost sounds like they're eating them with a glass of red wine. I meant "hanging with them" and a nice glass of red wine. Actually, you don't even need to hang with them, just drink the nice glass of red wine without them. Hell, drink the entire bottle and THEN find the sock monkeys and put on a puppet show for your guests. Make sure you invite me - could be highly entertaining.....