DRACO, FERGIE, CORVUS & VLADIMIR

DRACO, FERGIE, CORVUS & VLADIMIR: Born - February 2012. These four amazing Sock Monkeys are all siblings - born from the same package of socks I picked up at Extra Foods. So, here's the thing about these four lovely siblings. They all have "Anemophobia" which is, the "fear of wind". How all four of them managed to have this fear is a mystery to me BUT, there you have it, all Anemophobiacs. This of course plays havoc with them when they try to swing from the chandeliers or just move from one place to another. One gust of wind - monkey made or weather made - and the four go into seizures. Don't even get me started when one of them farts - it's a freakin nightmare!! Not only are they having seizures, but they're farting at the same time (and by this time, uncontrollably) and it STINKS!! Once you get them to hold still and not move so they don't create wind, they tend to calm down and aside form the rotten smell, you'd never know they were all in seizures moments ago.
ANYWAY, I tend to keep the four taped down to the desk so there's very little movement. Amazing what duct tape can do.

ELOI & CHEE-CHEE

ELOI: Born - February 2012. Eloi used to be a teacher at the local elementary school for years. He was especially good at teaching young kids how to hang from chandeliers and most light fixtures. This was all fine and dandy until one afternoon when a grade 1 student got caught in the chandelier by her pigtails and had to be cut out in order to get down. No biggy you think BUT, her parents flipped out when they heard her hair had been cut and in the aftermath of it all, Eloi lost his job. Now he doesn't teach anything. A waste of a great mind if you ask me.

CHEE-CHEE: Born - February 2012. Chee-Chee has a collection of plugs. He's been around the world a few times collecting all the different plug-ins he can find and displays them in his den. His most prized one is worth $17.00 at the local pawn shop. It comes from Egypt and is missing a prong - not by accident, but the manufacturer actually missed a prong! Chee-Chee was so excited when he found this he took it to the local Newspaper for what he thought should be a headlining story. He was laughed out of the building and told to go "plug' the story elsewhere. Chee-Chee still collects plugs but doesn't get too excited about his finds anymore...

HANSON

"HANSON"

HANSON AND HIS STICK....

HANSON: Born - January 2012. Hanson was made as a special donation for a fundraiser that just happens to fall on the "Old-Timers" Hockey Tournament this weekend. Like most of the Old-Timer hockey players, he has a few missing teeth, his outfit is a little ratty and he's not quite "all there" anymore. Hanson was made from a pair of hockey socks generously donated by a certain Old-Timer, as is his hat, and he is named for the Hanson brothers of the classic 1977 movie "Slap Shot" (which I'm sure all the old timers will remember). The Jersey is made from an extra large jersey sent to my husband from his Union. Since my husband does not play hockey (we are Broomball enthusiasts), he was kind enough to donate the jersey and let me cut it into small pieces. Actually, he left it laying around for days after receiving it in the mail and I tend to lay claim to unwanted articles of clothing, so he didn't have much choice in the matter....
ANYWAY, here he is in all his radiant and toothless glory, Hanson. I hope he helps raise money this weekend and makes some Old-Timer (or Old-Timers offspring) happy!

NIKITA & CLAUDIA

Nikita: Born - January 2012. Nikita is your regular run of the mill kinda Sock Monkey. You know the type. Hangs out in the chandelier most days, eats bananas, makes faces at the kids out the window, farts, picks bugs outta the other Sock Monkeys. There's not too many interesting things about Nikita, she's just pretty average...UNTIL you get a load of her colour!! Whoa! That is some bright yellow!  Nikita would NEVER get lost in the dark or a snow storm for that matter. She could blind airplane pilots! I could go on, but I won't - she's eyeballing me....
CLAUDIA: Born - January 2012. Claudia likes to roll herself up in the blinds in my craft room. It wouldn't be so bad except I totally fall for it every time and BAM! She rolls out and ends up scaring me...not a good thing for her. One time I was so startled I smacked her with a bat - another time she spooked me so badly I threw her against the wall. Yeesh! You'd think she'd learn by AAAAAAHHHHHHH!!!! You little  *@#* Claudia!!!! She just did it again!! Time to get out the gun....

EVERETT, SQUEAKER & FISHER

EVERETT: Born - January 2012. Everett has always dreamed of living in the Antarctic and mingling with the penguins that reside there. Though he knows how cold it can get and the conditions which these penguins live in and have to endure, it's still top on his wish list. Wow. How many Sock Monkeys do you know that would have that kind of a dream? Maybe to live in the tropics but the Antarctic? Good on you Everett, I hope you make it there one day! 
SQUEAKER: Born - January 2012. Squeaker is kind of an odd sock monkey. Rather than speaking, he squeaks. Some say it has to do with the fact that there are mice printed all over his body BUT, we have a different theory. We here at Sock Monkey Mayhem believe he was secretly implanted with a squeaker toy while I was away from the craft room. It's currently under investigation and so far, no one is owning up. We think it was the cat "Mr. Bean" whom we were taking care of for a few days. Very suspicious that it happened while he was here. We're on to you Bean...
FISHER: Born - January 2012. Fisher sucks at fishing. He tried his luck at a few Fishing Derby's but never did well. Actually, in all his years, he's never caught a fish yet. Seriously Fisher, just because your name has the word "fish" in it does NOT mean you have to be all about FISH!! Besides, fish stink and are slimy, all the things most Sock Monkeys want to avoid. Move on Fisher.

CARLTON, TED & NORBIE

CARLTON: Born - January 2012. Carlton used to be a doorman at the local hi-rise. His job was to be available at all times to open the door for the tenants of the building.This went well for Carlton until the day he let in an old grandmother who took it upon herself to have a heart attack in the elevator between the 12th and 14th floor. This did not go over well with the hi-rise owner as where she died would be considered the "13th" floor that does but doesn't exist in the hi-rise. I mean right in the middle of those two specific floors. Creepy. Anyway, half the tenants were freaked out and moved so Carlton got fired. The owner realized it really wasn't a necessity to have a doorman anyway, just give all the tenants their own keys. Not rocket science but it took him long enough to figure it out.
TED: Born - January 2012. 'There once was a monkey named Ted, who constantly hogged the whole bed, his wife named Flo, said "Ted, you must go", and promptly shot him in the head.' Ha, ha - Ted's gonna love that one!
NORBIE: Born - January 2012. Norbie loves poetry and especially limericks. He wrote the above one and bribed me with foot massages to post it. Ooooooh... that feels great...wow....nothing like a good foot massage after a gruelling day at the computer.

McFLY, MARTY, DOC & BUNZ

McFLY, MARTY, DOC & BUNZ: Born - January, 2012. Sing it with me folks - "One of these things is not like the other, one of these things just doesn't belong..." Have you figured it out yet? Well, here's a hint. The movie previewed in 1985 and was the highest grossing movie that year and shot Michael J. Fox into super stardom. Still don't have it? It involved a "pimped-up" DeLorean car. Alright, the movie is "Back to the Future" and the above first three Sock Monkeys (McFly, Marty & Doc) are named for characters from the movie. As for Bunz, he doesn't have a tail and the name seemed to fit. Getting back to the movie, it was recently re-mastered on DVD and 27 years later, my kids are watching it and LOVING it! Fabulous trilogy, if you can rent it sometime, do it - you won't regret it.
Now back to the monkeys. All they do is hang out in the TV room waiting for someone to get home so they can beg you to put in "Back to the Future".... You knew I was going there right??